Selfish ?

Paul Theroux, in his book –Dark Star Safari- recalled how he reacted to this remark-

“When I told Africans where I come from, and how slowly I had traveled, they said, “So you must be retired.”

“No,no, no” I said, over-reacting, because I despised the word and equated it with surrender. “I’m traveling,I’m working,” That wasn’t it, either, not business, not pleasure, not work, not retirement, but the process of life, how I chose to pass the time”

Page-209,Dark Star Safari.

AFTER THE CELEBRATIONS

On the occasion of Canada 150, there were many celebrations, fireworks, and retrospectives.

I attended three such occasions- Bradley Museum-50 years, the Missing chapters- talk and exhibition at the Art Gallery of Mississauga, and the Fireworks at Port Credit’s Memorial park.

(see links below)

But there are aspects of Canadian life, which do not go with the celebrations.

In following –Coming of Age- of Studs Terkel, in which he interviewed persons who were above 70 years, to get a feel of what society, life was in 20th century America, I went a bit deeper into the lives of two civic centre assistants now living in British Columbia,  who had come to Canada in their 50s, and now almost 20 years down the line are of the same age, which would qualify them to be in the group to be interviewed by Studs Terkel.

SELFISH

As I went with this friend of mine, through his rounds of the library and the adjoining YMCA , where he has a group of persons who have taken membership in the lounge like special area, and he told of his life in East Africa, where he was born and grew up, his family having migrated from Western India, more than a century ago, a flavor of Canadian life , not much talked about came alive.

“If it is about sacrifices and support, my parents too did the same, so why cannot they live with us,” his daughter-in-law, of Gujarati origin, her parents staying in a rented apartment in UK, a brother who is in UK, and barely able to take care of himself, leave aside taking care of his parents, said, setting the tone and tempo of the dynamics in the married life of this septuagenarian’s son, when she first became a member of this family.

“I should not be telling you this, but she even called in the police, when there were conflicts in the initial days of their marriage. Now I keep to the library, gym, and try to keep out of the ways of my son, who also has changed , from the initial days of his marriage, his center of gravity has shifted more towards his wife and child, rather than his parents.”

He sometimes tended to say that his son was selfish, at other times, he remembered the unconditional support and resources he poured into making the lives of both his sons, how they had migrated, the education his sons had received in UK, India and then Canada.

All this shifting, education, settling , giving them the base had taken many years, and resources, and then our friend, had wound up his business, and shifted to Canada for good.

So you have come for good?

This is a remark I hear many Canadian immigrants ask each other, the question underlining the uncertainty and tentativeness of this move, which  many professionals who migrate here in their 40s, 50s in search of a “better life” .

Wright Morris , pinpointed the dilemma of the sound byte of instant wisdom (On Whasapp)

“We’re in the world of communication more and more, though we’re in communication less and less.”

READING JOURNAL

I have kept a Reading Journal for many years. This is a habit which enriches life in many interesting ways.

As I intended to stay in Canada for an extended period , I decided to join a Reading Group, a Book club of the Mississauga Library system, in the Courtney Park Library .

As part of that exercise, in next blog, will share some notes from that Reading Journal based on the discussions .

Apart from the books discussed, the members also made interesting remarks about ways of life in Canada. Through this Reading group, we discussed some facets of Canadian Life, like the legend of John Hornby and other interesting discussions

Click on photographs below to see larger versions

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EXPLORING ASPECTS OF CANADIAN LIFE-ON OCCASION OF CANADA 150…THE CABIN OF JOHN HORNBY. The Explorer John Hornby became known as the “hermit of the north” for his efforts to live off the land with limited supplies..The Legend of John Hornby came alive while discussing the novel- Late Nights on Air by Elizabeth Hay Source By Hayne at the English language Wikipedia, CC BY-SA 3.0, https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=32926669

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EXPLORING FACETS OF CANADIAN LIFE- ON CANADA 150- REMEMBERING DR TAYLOR STATTEN-II…..Suggested further reading:  https://www.theglobeandmail.com/life/health-and-fitness/health/child-psychiatrist-dr-taylor-statten-ii-was-an-inspiration-to-young-campers/article31473457/

 

SOME BOOKS REMEMBERED-2016-2017…some books discussed in Mississauga Library system.

 

 

READING THINKING PLACES

As it is summer, I go to some of my thinking places and read there

RATTRAY MARSH-PORT CREDIT..A relatively more peaceful place to read

 

 

This introduced Port Credit area in different ways for me, as I sought to go into more peaceful areas, where normal picnickers will not venture much.

SUGGESTED FURTHER LINKS

BRADLEY 50 http://wp.me/piL5Q-1cM

MISSING CHAPTERS http://wp.me/piL5Q-1d5

FIREWORKS AT CANADA 150- Memorial Park-Port Credit

 

Commencement- Glenforest-2017-

 

 

 

 

 

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Missing Chapters

Anne Lamott said of writing- You can do it the way you used to clear the dinner dishes when you were thirteen, or you can do it as a Japanese person would perform a tea ceremony, with a level of concentration and care in which you can lose yourself, and so in which you can find yourself

Family Camera-Missing Chapters

The Family Camera-Missing Chapters-at Art Gallery of Mississauga

The above words of Anne Lamott, came to mind, as Art historian and senior curator of ROM- Deepali Dewan, brought to life the stories behind the photographs in the Missing Chapters section of Family Camera Network, which have been put up in the Art Gallery of Mississauga. Her own piece published in ROM Magazine showing her around a year old, with a pet dog, in Delhi in early seventies tells many things about class, structure of society in the India of that period

A sister remembering her lost brother

Missing Chapters 1

Maurice-when she sees this photograph, she sees a boy who was misunderstood by students and teachers alike. This is one of the few photographs she has of her brother who tragically passed away in an accident in 2001

The school photograph is something which all of us are familiar with, but this being the photograph of a brother who is no more with her, a sister’s memory of the teenage angst and the way the family migrated from UK to Jamaica to Canada put things into a different perspective.

A Foster parent having to leave their child

What would have become of that foster child who my parents left behind, due to immigration

District 5, Saigon, Vietnam-Mid seventies

Sculptural installations

After the fall of Saigon, in the mid seventies many Vietnamese destroyed photographs which could have incriminated them

Leaving Saigon and destroying photographs so that their family could not be incriminated, and now after many years, they return and reconstruct the memories of their families and lives. The sculptural installation of the many photographs with details about their lives written on the back side, added an interesting dimension

 

Vietnamese American Artist Dinh Q found these photographs taken between 1940s and 1980 on returning to Vietnam, and serve as a medium for the artist to understand his place in the complex cultural and political history of Vietnam

 

Family Camera-Vietnam-1970s

1970s-Vietnam-After fall of Saigon

How Memory is constructed

Family camera network 1

In her introduction -Dr. Deepali Dewan talked about her journey as an Art Historian, how she found a silence on one of the most common forms of photography- the Family Photographs.        Dr Dewan has written about history of Photography on India. In 2013 she curated a major exhibition at ROM- Raja Deen Dayal: Artist-Photographer in 19th-century India .

One participant made an interesting comment about how memory is constructed. He knows some persons intimately, who have portrayed a very different picture of their lives on their Facebook-archive.

Memories of Previous exhibitions

Rastafari- on Jamaica-50 years-2012- http://wp.me/piL5Q-sX

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Bradley Museum-50 years

The many manifestations and significance of having a Community museum were spoken about. Later, over the strawberry cake and lemonade , we went through some personal memories associated with this Museum.

Then we walked through the Anchorage-the house of Captain Skynner(1762-1846), where there is a Cup, given to him for his participation in the Napoleonic war in Malta. This brought back personal memories of our own association of staying two years in Malta, and the many walks we had in Valletta, Sliema, Gozo came alive.

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John Skynner (1762-1846) was born in England in 1762 to a family steeped in the traditions of the Royal Navy as both his father and grandfather had been high ranking officers. Skynner immigrated to Upper Canada in 1839 and made his home in The Anchorage, a comfortable and stylish cottage on the shores of Lake Ontario. The property itself had belonged to the Jarvis family who had used the protected waters as a shipping point for goods to and from York (Toronto) and Niagara. John Skynner and his family moved into The Anchorage after his retirement from the Royal Navy. Skynner fought at the Battle of the Nile and later served in all of Admiral Nelson’s campaigns except for Nelson’s decisive victory over Napoleon, at Trafalgar. Captain Skynner was commanding his own ship, the Hirondelle, with the Mediterranean fleet at the time. 
Source  www.mississauga.ca

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Celebrating 50 years of Bradley Museum

On The Significance of the Community Museum- some interesting insights by Mayor Bonnie Crombie

 

Some personal memories of our family’s association with Malta

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Around Father’s day-2017

I purposely use the word have rather than had when talking with the kids about their dad. I want them to appreciate that even though Tom isn’t here with us physically, he is alive with God, and they still have a dad

McGuiness, Cheryl. Beauty Beyond the Ashes: Choosing Hope After Crisis (pp. 205-206).

Howard Books. Kindle Edition.

 

Around –Father’s Day-I read the above lines from Cheryl McGuiness’s book, which had been given as the example of growth through pain- in John Maxwell’s book-15 laws of Growth. Having a relationship with a loved one who has passed away, and using books as a framework to shape our thoughts, made me write a Father’s day message to my sister in India.

FATHER’S DAY

The memories of a scooter in which he would take us for rides when we were small, the Khirkee cantonment in the seventies and the prayer-outings to Parvati-temple of Pune. These memories of childhood, cement our ties , now that our parents are no longer physically with us.

BOOK DISCUSSION

My father introduced me to libraries, inculcated the love of the written word in me, and over the years, this has enriched life in many ways. Having a Reading-Book-Club is a way to further enhance the reading process, what a particular work informs-educates about the human condition.

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2016-LEPTIS MAGNA-LIBYA…Going to open spaces and Reading, gives a different flavor to the Reading journal. Over the years, these Reading-Thinking places have added great richness to life.

Cherry McGuiness, wife of Tom McGuiness-the co-pilot on 9/11 tragedy, was invited by well meaning friends on Mother’s day, but the experience turned sour. So, as Father’s day came she planned a more private intimate setting, and after dinner-spent several hours going through the collection of Old family photographs.

She writes.

The disaster of Mother’s Day gave me the resolve I needed to take control of Father’s Day the next month. I reassumed family leadership and planned an event that would focus on Jennifer and Tommy and the great dad they have. (I purposely use the word have rather than had when talking with the kids about their dad. I want them to appreciate that even though Tom isn’t here with us physically, he is alive with God, and they still have a dad.) On Father’s Day 2003, the three of us came home after church and worked together to make a special meal. We had a great time in the kitchen, enjoying each other’s company as we cooked. After dinner we spent several hours going through our collection of old family photographs. I had purchased a number of new photo albums, and we spent the evening sorting and organizing our family pictures. In the process we remembered in a positive and joyful way the many wonderful years we had with Tom as a husband and dad.

McGuiness, Cheryl. Beauty Beyond the Ashes: Choosing Hope After Crisis (pp. 205-206). Howard Books. Kindle Edition.

CURRENT GENERATION

As we gathered our thoughts around Father’s day for the present generation, we went through some memories of yester years and walks which we have done through different places where we stayed. Due to our stay in different places, we have been associated with monuments-institutions in their vicinity.

2010 12-walks-xlendi gozo

2010-Dec-Walks together-Xlendi Gozo see Friends of Bouazizi – Year End diary-2011 Meeting –Tripoli Reading Group- 2011- http://wp.me/piL5Q-iP

2009-SABRATHA-LIBYA – DIARY BY THE SEA

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA

READING-THINKING PLACES…Sabratha-Libya-2008…many lovely hours, spent Reading-Discussing -The Tripoli Reading Group

2010-XLENDI-GOZO-MALTA..Manna dey-songs, some of my father’s favorites, I later sang with my sons, walking by the Mediterranean

2015-RIVERWOOD-MISSISSAUGA-CANADA..book discussions

READING PLACES- RIVERWOOD:19.6.16:  But the  slave of Khalaf’s letter was not of the company of the consequential people like wazirs,sultans,the chroniclers,and the priests –the people who have the power to inscribe themselves physically upon time…in his instance it was a mere accident that those barely discernible traces that ordinary people leave upon the world happen to have been preserved. (From Amitav Ghosh’s –In an Antique Land) ..Readings in Riverwood-in the morning- on the bench in memory of Zachary Jelovsek,(1995-2014)..Taken much too soon.

 

 

Port credit Readings

MERCHANT OF VENICE Many lovely hours spent at Port Credit- Discussing Nuances of Literature How Shakespeare created characters such as Shylock and Falstaff, who outgrew the confines of their play, and talk to people through the centuries. …………revenge! I’ll treat you as badly as you Christians taught me to— and you’ll be lucky if I don’t outdo my teachers. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T_5adzpdkdw

MUSEUM JOURNALS-AND READING PLACES

The love of the written word, and going to Museums-shaping them as “Thinking Places” were two gifts my father gave me, which I tried to pass on to my sons

Other related posts

Museums with Children  http://wp.me/PiL5Q-24

End Note: The words of Karl Khandalawala come to mind..many lovely hours spent walking these galleries of Prince of Wales-Chatrapathi Shivaji Museum-Mumbai

If my work enables even a few of my countrymen to realize the greatness of Indian painting and Art I will feel I have not labored in vain- Karl Khandalawala-Crusador for Indian art and culture

Through these Reading -Discussion Journals, logs of museums-Thinking places we have been to together, we maintain a living link between many generations of our family.

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Around Mother’s Day-2017

“India was the motherland of our race, and Sanskrit the mother of Europe’s languages: she was the mother of our philosophy; mother, through the Arabs, of much of our mathematics; mother, through the Buddha, of the ideals embodied in Christianity; mother, through the village community, of self-government and democracy. Mother India is in many ways the mother of us all”.

Will Durant-American Historian

I went for some walks to -Thinking Places-and reviewed some Mother Energies.

My father lost his mother when he was around five years old, and his elder cousin sisters- Padma Buaji and Saraswati Bua-ji being the most memorable amongst them, shaped his thinking and family life in many ways.

So, as I look back on these past months,when their grandsons got married,  I reflected on the  many Mother energies which went into shaping the family .

REMEMBERING I-611 AND B 1260..AND House number 4-Upper Kaithu

On 28.2.17 my nephew Rohit got married, on 18.4.17- my nephew Mudit got married and on these occasions I remembered some places associated with their grandmothers- Padma Dobhal and the Dobhal Family of 1-611 Sarojini Nagar and Saraswati Dabral- and the Dabral Family with their journeys through Moradabad, education, and B 1260 Palam Vihar.

They are my father’s sisters- and the mind’s eye went back to the time when the Bhatt family would stay in House number 4, Upper Kaithu Bazaar- Shimla and pray at Kali Bari and Jakhoo Temples of Shimla..

28 2 17 Rohit Dobhal marriage

28-2-2017-Delhi-My elder brother Shri Yogendra Dobhal and Nirmal Bhabhi-ji blessing the newly married couple-Rohit Dobhal and Prabhjeet Kaur-Dobhal

MY FATHER’S SISTERS..

My father's sisters -Saraswati-Laxmi

MY FATHER’S SISTERS…….2015-At Taj Mahal-Saraswati and Laxmi Bua-ji, their links with Agra and Meerut and the many family discussions and teachings we all gained over many loving meals at B-Block 1260 Palam Vihar

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MY FATHER’S SISTERS ……..2012- 4-UPPER KAITHU BAZAAR-Bhatt family memories-my father’s sisters-Savitri bua ji on a visit-pilgrimages to Upper Kaithu Bazaar with Surendra-mama ji and my sister Priti Dutta nee Thapliyal

1999 C 1804 PALAM VIHAR

MY FATHER’S SISTERS……1999…C 1804 PALAM VIHAR.. Padma Bua ji ,(Padma Dobhal) with my mother and Sanjoo Bhai’s son, and Bhabhiji and Mamta-Sagar

MY MOTHER’S SISTERS- C 1804 PALAM-1999-October

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1999- MY MOTHER’S SISTERS- PALAM VIHAR with Abha and Meena mousi-jis and Smarika and Shounkie Nawani

PRAYERS-CEREMONIES-PALAM VIHAR- APRIL 2017

18-4-17 B1260 PALAM Vihar (1)

Family prayers-B Block 1260-Palam Vihar-18-4-17-marriage of Mudit and Nidhi, with Shashi Bhabhi-ji and Saraswati Buaji.

28 4 17 MUDIT NIDHI

APRIL 2017 ..Prayers and family gatherings- Mudit and Nidhi Dabral wedding-18-4-17

SOME LEGACY THOUGHTS-CONVERSATIONS

Places, persons, and family memories associated through generations came to mind- as I recollected the many mother energies which go into shaping the family legacy.

Dadaji-Papaji-Chachaji-Mummy-1968

Delhi-1968- me on the lap of my Dada-ji-Bhawani Shankar Bhatt-with Jeevan Chacha-ji, my mother-Nirja Bhatt -nee Uniyal sitting beside him and my father Prem Narain Bhatt standing in background.

Remembering some conversations with Guddu-Bhai- (Shri Yogendra Dobhal) in Lodhi Gardens -Delhi..we have met there over the years, whenever I return to India, we embrace each other with tears in our eyes, and he lightly scolds me- Return-what less do you have in India- in a way which only an elder brother can scold..mixing rebuke with great affection

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Every Object has a story

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BRADLEY-MUSEUM- Mississauga

Click on image to see bigger version

At the same time, we have retreated from public spaces of our old neighbourhoods into the private spaces of our automobiles, the anonymity of our high-rises, the security of our gated-communities, and the isolation of our urban homes. Because of almost total reliance on the automobile, we find it inconvenient to ship and live in our older neighbourhoods, and we too often use their streets as one-way speedways to get us everywhere else.

Bill Manson- Local historian of Hamilton

in Foreward to –Footsteps in Time,

Exploring Hamilton’s Heritage Neighbourhoods.

The false fire-alarms at the Art Gallery of Hamilton- AGH- got us talking and Bill Manson told that he has written four books on the local history of Hamilton, which he says he started exploring a bit more closely since he retired sixteen years ago. His talks on Expanding the Circle: Robert Davidson and the Ancient Language of Haida Art and Sara Angelucci: Piece Work were well researched and informative and give a window into what it means to be a Canadian living in the 21st century, in the year of celebration of Canada’s 150th birthday.

CANADIAN MUSEUMS AND PUBLIC SPACES

By living in an area-one gets associated with many aspects of that region.

As examples- have shown the videos of Dhari Devi temple and Alaknanda in Garhwal Himalayas- an association which comes with our family base in Palam region of Delhi

Or the Maltese Chapels and Museums which came with our association with the Sweiqi-St Julian region of Malta.

Walks through the Toronto Zoo, Royal Ontario museum and Port Credit area came with the association with Mississauga.

As Canada observes it’s 150th birthday, here are two slideshows –Royal Ontario Museum and Art Gallery of Hamilton

ROYAL ONTARIO MUSEUM

OUR INDIAN ORIGINS

Ganga- Shivpuri region-Garhwal Himalayas… Uttarakhand, India                                            See Blog-
What is Satsang
https://prashantbhatt.com/2011/12/06/what-is-satsang/

Touching base with the Garhwal Himalayas-when I visited my father’s cousin sister, she took me to the Dhari Devi Temple, where our family has been associated for centuries and many generations. She remembered the time when her children were small- and they used to come for a picnic to Dhari Devi. Now both –Divyanshu and Mitali are studying in Dehradun. Joshi-ji is preparing for his retirement next year, and he told his children to first secure base with one qualification which will earn them some stability and later build on that and buttress one’s academic portfolio. Both children are following that realistic bottomline approach and slowly expanding their Horizons. Our families go back a long way, and many associations over the decades , which add depth and perspective and identity came alive as we spent a quiet evening. The Alaknanda flows nearby. This is where our ancestral village is. In the Garhwal Himalayas, before the Ganga is formed- at Devprayag. Meditated on the meanings of Satsang, over the years.

PRAYERS AT DHARI-DEVI- 12 km North of Srinagar –Garhwal Himalayas

ALAKNANDA- Chamoli region –Garhwal Himalayas

EXPLORING NEIGHBOURHOODS
I went through parts of the books –Footsteps in Time and History of Transportation in Hamilton, with my sons, and we decided to have a relook at some of the Neighbourhoods with whom we have been associated with before coming to Canada in 2012. As many chronic immigrants tell – Five years is regarded as a new immigrant here. It takes a few years to figure out life over here.
Because of our association with the Sweiqi- St Julian Neighbourhood of Malta , we were associated with some art movements of Southern Europe and got a feel of European civilization first hand. Living in a place is different from visiting it for a few days. Getting into the system of schools, transport, housing made us explore the layers of community involved in the St.Edward’s college Cottonera, the Museums and Theatres of Malta.
Malta-Museum of Fine Arts

The Chapel of St Edwards, Cottonera

Gozo Citadel

INTERROGATING LAYERS
As I thought about the words of Bill Manson, a life long educator, who used to teach theatre, about the anonymity of the lives, and the works of artists like Sara Angelucci which give voice to the anonymous worker, her meaning of Alchemy came to mind.

“I think of the hands of the sewers in Piece Work as mano d’oro [hands of gold]. Like alchemists they transform one element into another; their exacting labour turns fabric into dollars, dollars into bread.”
Sara Angelucci

These intimate works, made me recall some walks in different neighbourhoods I have had over the years, and connecting with our ancestral village in Garhwal Himalayas, or the landscapes and chapels of Malta and the associations which come with our life in Mississauga, Ontario

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Reflections-through architecture, learning, talks

The home is the lens, through which we get our first look at marriage and all civic duties. It is the clinic where , by conversation and attitude, impressions are created with respect to sobriety and reverence, it is the school where lessons of truth or falsehood , honesty and deceit are learned, it is the mould which ultimately determines the structures of society

Perry Webb-quoted in Today Matters-by John Maxwell

Around the birthdays of my nephew Mayank (27.2.2002) and son Sagar (28.2.1999) I went through some walks and conversations of yesteryears, with architecture as a focus.

2011- mayank-doing-rolly-polly

Mayank doing Rolly Polly-Purana Quila-Delhi-October 2011

Some journeys-Click on Images to view larger versions-comments

Workshops-Gozo-Gjantiga

GJANTIGA TEMPLES ..GOZO-2010 DEC

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Chapel-St.Edward’s Cottonera

2014 10 NIAGARA 1

WITH NIKOLA TESLA- NIAGARA-US SIDE-OCT 2014

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Purana Quila-Delhi

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VT-Mumbai

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Gjantija Temples-Gozo-Malta- 19th century drawing-Source-Wikipedia

The Rolly Polly my nephew did in the garden tombs of Delhi region- Purana Quila- in October 2011 when I visited Delhi after an eventful year, staying in Libya-through the NATO backed civil war, and losing my mother, is still fresh in my memory.

That was the year, I deepened my connection with some institutions in Malta, through my sons studying there, the St.Edward’s college-Cottonera- and the Maltese Indian Community through their Yoga Satsangs at the San Gjwann Centre. (Sukh Sagar). The architecture of Gjantija temples of Gozo-the oldest free standing structure known to man, and the Chapel of St Edwards which was earlier a storage during the times of the Knights of St John came to mind. I had met Sagar’s mother for the first time, in a World Heritage Site-the Victoria Terminus of Mumbai- in 1993.

KAAGAD MAT PHADO

Last year, Sagar learnt how to read-write-speak-listen to Gujarati, while studying the weekend classes at Rick Hansen School. This was something he was not able to do, despite many years in India, because he grew up in his early years in Delhi region, where we used to talk Hindi, and then shifted to Tripoli (where he picked up some Arabic) and later stayed in Mumbai where his grandparents would talk in Hindi. Canada gave him the opportunity to revisit his roots in a different way, as he explored the nuances of his mother tongue, and also the temples-spiritual traditions of Gujarat, the Dwarkadish temples and the Palitana temples. (these were part of the presentations which the children made on the final day of their course)

That brings me to the Kaagad Mat Phado- Do not tear away the paper (of immigration) decision which we made in 2012 and decided to give our children a chance and go at Canadian citizenship, though as mid career professionals we had some idea of the rampant unemployment, under employment and accreditation issues which professionals face in the Canadian system.

NARRATIVES

As the children enter their teenage years, the immigration cycles and high school cycles being completed, looking at some architecture which we discussed, visited, and recalling some conversations around our decisions and journeys, made me see the Big Picture in a different way.

QUESTION FOR APPLICATION

Recall some conversation, place you were associated with, reflecting on which gave you a window at different aspects of life, society.

 

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