Changing pace-in multigenerational setting


Do not be economically astute, intellectually bankrupt

Paraphrased from an interview discussion of Bishop T D Jakes, in GLS 2018-as he talked with Strive Masiyiwa

As the grandparents visited Ontario, we went for some walks. Riverwood and Port Credit areas of Mississauga are some of the favorites.


Blue Mountains area of Ontario is a great place for a getaway for a short trip, to have a change of pace. We saw videos together of the times when we went for walks to Manori, Aksa beach regions of Mumbai or attended the various programs of the Bombay Natural History society- that was around ten years ago. The children used to study in Primary school then. Now , having gone through secondary school, high school and entering college-university education, they are in a different season of life.



Having stayed in Tripoli, came to know closely , professionals from different parts of the world. They introduced me to their music, and chants, spiritual practices, and traditions. How the calendar of the Orthodox church is different from the Catholic calendar.


An evening at Kariya Park, which we first visited in July 2012, now six years on, the three generations came together here.


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On Tracking and Clubs

Write down all the moves, this will help improve your game

Bharat bhai-on Tracking



As I saw Sahil and his uncle-Bharat Mama play chess, I remembered many such games I had played with my father, uncles, and grandfather in the 70s/80s, and how this was- along with the walking clubs, reading groups, one of the first clubs I became part of, informally, which added a great richness to life.




Around Father’s day, we had gone for walks, to Kariya Park area, and remembered previous walks-over yesteryears-with Father Figures of the community in Malta-2012, where we had even gone to the Cemetery at Floriana and paid respects to seniors of times gone by.



See blog

The first ever walking club I remember was of the Pune of the 1970s when we would go for early morning walks – See blog-


WALKS-RAS AL HILAAL-SUSA-JEBEL AKHDAR-Green Mountains-Eastern Libya-2006


When asked what gift I want from Mumbai, I told to bring Those days-the translation of Sunil Gangopadhyaya’s novel-Sei Samay- by Aruna Chakravarti.

We read some parts of the novel in Riverwood…


In the year 2017-2018 we had discussed –Anthony Doerr’s novel-All the

lights we cannot see


I integrated some parts of my Reading Journal into the Reading-Walking Diary I keep –especially in Summer months- going out to open spaces like Riverwood, Port Credit, Hamilton mountain locations and sitting and reading/discussing

See Blog-


Some interesting insights after discussions on Doerr’s novel



  • As a genre I do not like reading war novels….


  • What about the French Resistance Kangaroo courts…


  • Bildungsroman novels- Sunil Gangopadhyay’s –Sei Samay-Those Days



This was a unique visit of Bharat bhai and family with parents visiting from India


KARIYA-PARK- 2018-July ..Many journeys remembered.







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A few moments more

Perfectionism is a dangerous state of mind in an imperfect world. The best way is to forget doubts and set about the task at hand…if you are doing your best, you will not have time to worry about failure.”

Robert Hillyer, Poet and Harvard Professor

as quoted in John Maxwell’s book-The 360 Degree Leader

28 6 18 Gordon Graydon Graduation-2018

On the morning of the last day of school of my younger son Sahil, I went with him to Gordon Graydon memorial school to collect his last report card. We drove past Cawthra road to Ogden Avenue and memories of the first time he had taken me to this school four years ago, came alive. The accepting spirit of the staff here came alive in many ways over the years, as they guided my son through the high school grades.

“I see a future college university level student in him,” his French teacher in Grade 9-  Mr. Spanier had told me encouragingly as I had attended the first Parent Teacher meeting session in Gordon Graydon in 2014, a bit worried how he will transition from Camilla to Gordon Graydon.

“ He is a bit quiet but does his work. In building a life and room for ourselves in this society, new immigrants sometimes are not able to cope up with some aspects of parenting. This is internalized in many different ways by students-who themselves are transitioning through society, life, adolescence. This may lead to some children becoming very quiet.” Ms.Anton, the Physics teacher told us in the last Parent Teacher meeting we had, summarizing many currents.


It was an emotional Graduation ceremony, as the class of 2018 will be the last graduating class of this school as the school closes its doors after 61 years of service to the community. Speakers with long-term relations addressed their relation to the school and its legacy, the tradition of education.


THE ADULT LEARNING SCHOOL- Valedictorian story

The story of the moth, needing time to grow out of the cocoon, was told very movingly. This has many lessons for all of us, in whatever stage of life we may be in

The above-quoted words of Robert Hillyer-on perfectionism in an imperfect world, matched the story of the moth and the cocoon, with struggle being the basis of growth, freedom, and flight


As we finished the ceremonies and the refreshments, we started walking back towards the car. Then Sahil gave us another nice memory and lesson of the day, as we parents in our haste to get on with our other commitments were told- I want to stay a few moments more.

Sahil stood quietly on the lawns of Cawthra school, where this final graduation ceremony of Gordon Graydon was held. He did not mingle with the crowd, but just stood on the side and watched the energy and enthusiasm of the students and staff. I do not know what exactly went through this young man’s mind, as he is on the threshold of a new chapter in his life.

But as a parent, I saw the movie of his school days come across me, in a few magical moments. I remembered the times he told of his school trips to Stratford, in 2016, on the 400th birth anniversary of Shakespeare. Or the times when he would go for live-Ins in St.Edward’s college-Malta. Or the times when he won the three-legged race in Pinnacle High –Malad-Mumbai (see blog- 2009-March- A three-legged race He started his educational journey in play school in L’avenir –The Future- a school run by the Gnostic center, Delhi. As I thought of the different teachers and institutions who in their many creative dedicated ways shaped the identity of Sahil, a feeling of gratitude came across.


In your actions, don’t procrastinate
In your conversations, don’t confuse.
In your thoughts, don’t wander.
In your soul, don’t be passive or aggressive.
In your life, don’t be all about business
Marcus Aurelius, Stoic Philosopher

The Stoics counseled that perfection and contentment could be reached through reason, simple living, indifference to pain and death, and social equality.

To the Stoics, a wise man was one who played the cards that were dealt him, uncomplainingly and with dignity, whether a slave or a king

Keeping reading journals and using literature as a framework has been a quest over the years.

Earlier perspectives- See blog-Readings in Riverwood



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Around Father’s Day-2018

Our family comes originally from the hills of Garhwal-and in Nov 2016, I had the good opportunity to pray and reflect at the Dhari Devi Temple where our family has prayed for generations.

This Father’s Day, 2018, I sat with my sons over a quiet meal and showed them some momentoes of the family- the Medals my father got over the decades of service to the Indian army. This year, I tried to guide my son Sagar and niece Divya into higher education, and try in my own way to explain the difference between school education and professional education.


AROUND THE GANGA-Our family comes from the villages of Garhwal Himalayas, before the Ganga is known as the Ganga- at Devprayag..This is Alaknanda- around Chamoli area.Nov 2016


Wilket Creek is one of my thinking places, and here, I have come over the years and try to break down complex issues into manageable parts , think through them and then create new possibilities and realities.

Micromanaging Teenagers?

As a father – it is challenging and frustrating to try and micro-manage teenagers who are trying to break into the professional studies


GOZO CITADEL- MALTESE ISLANDS..BUILDING PERSPECTIVES AND CONTEXTS…When our family stayed in Malta-I came across seniors who showed me some of the challenges ahead-About Micromanaging Teenagers- a thing which one should not try…Over walks in and around Maltese islands, going for history walks in places like the Gozo citadel, built perspectives and contexts

The more you try-the more difficult it will become, so do not try too much- One senior told me, as he recalled his own efforts a few years ago, when he tried to convince his son, a brilliant high school student to not take up a literature course in Classics, the current world requires some more practical professional degrees.

The son did not listen, and went off to study classical literature at a University level, when he could have taken any course of his choice, based on his brilliant performance in the High school level.

For this, one has to try and balance –between not going into an overdrive –while being available to revise and think through the key aspects.

One has to try not to micro-manage, and just be available if they seek counsel, and try to give it in as capable-brief and relevant manner as possible.

These are aspects with whom I struggle and try to address in my own way, and this Father’s day, looking back on the year gone by, and also the times when I was a fresh professional student- on how to give direction and guidance, while not trying to micro-manage.



a place where I went back and reflected upon the different public and educational institutions of which we became a part of-as our family started staying in Greater Toronto Area-GTA.


As my younger son Sahil will pass out of Grade 12-(Gordon Graydon) this year, I look back at some thoughts shared at the Graduation day of my elder son Sagar-last year-at Glenforest


We went for walks- to talk things over – around Father’s day and I looked back on some of the walks we went this year


2017 8 Algonquin-Canoe Lake

ALGONQUIN…many stories about people who walked these trails before..the paintings of Tom Thomson, the efforts of Taylor Statten-II – see…for further nuances…People who built parts of the Canadian identity

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Diary as a Looking Glass


The diary is a looking glass. At first it reflects the diarist.

But it ends by revealing the reader

Stefan Kanfer, in Introduction to Penguin Book of Diaries.

Selected by Ronald Blythe

* * * * * * *

What would a family member have written about a day trip- fifty years ago?


As we roamed around in Riverwood , Jack Darling, Rattray Marsh areas of Mississauga, and I showed Hardik and Aarti, the many places where we have read and walked in Riverwood- this question made me think of the many journeys done by different sections of the family over time.


The Yellow Trail is different from the Red Trail. Then we walked towards Erindale park and sat on a bench where we have come many times over the years and read-reflected on works of literature. Today, (20.5.18-Sunday) we went through the introductions and some thoughts on the Penguin Book of diaries from our home library.



Hardik told of the day he managed to get an interview with a university representative in Churchgate area and how he drove in his Splendour Motorcycle from Bhiwandi.

That trip has now evolved into many journeys, and he visited Niagara to see the Sound and Lights on Victoria day.

Now he goes to New Jersey to visit his uncle, who once gifted him a tennis racket- and there were some of his colony friends who commented that this was a strange type of badminton racket.

Hardik has come a long way from the time he would think of setting up a Gaming company or help his father with the pharmacy.

Learned many things regarding the running of two branches of the Car Rental Enterprise company, from the Business model to the time when a colleague told his Manager-(Mr.Hardik)…

“ I am closing the branch in five minutes and leaving. There is an emergency in my daughter’s school.”

The Manager has to think fast.

“Can you wait for fifteen minutes while I try to arrange something?”

He could not let his Branch close down in the middle of the day.


These places are also part of our Reading journal –Thinking place exercises.


Rattray Marsh-Port Credit-Mississauga-One of our Thinking -Reading places

What does a particular work of literature or art tell us about humanity? With Appu, who had come from Vasai-Malad, we had discussed Howard Zinn’s- A People’s History of United States and browsed through some pages from Teresa Albuquerque’s- Bassein-The Portuguese  Interlude.

This Sunday, while walking through Riverwood’s –Yellow Trail, I told Hardik about the last book we discussed in the 2017-2018 year of the Courtney Park Book Club.

In the pre-discussion entry of Anthony Doerr’s book-see blog I felt that some characters like Von Rumpel- the gemologist, who may have not been the main protagonists start developing a stronger voice than Werner or Marie Laure.

What new insights were gained through the Book Club discussion

Reading and then rating a book out of 10 can be an interesting exercise. This had been mentioned in the previous blogs- discussing Jack Reacher’s

Then the members give their comments and rating on the books- this is followed by discussions on the characters, plot, genre and what we can get out of this particular work of literature.

See blog-  for a detailed discussion on what makes a character like Jack Reacher so durable, can such a character exist, what other types of wars exist.

Some interesting insights after discussions on Doerr’s novel

  • As a genre I do not like reading war novels….
  • What about the French Resistance Kangaroo courts…
  • Bildungsroman novels- Sunil Gangopadhyaya’s –Sei Samay-Those Days

While those many discussions are probably best not made directly public, the discussion did make a setting to explore whether Doerr’s Pulitzer prize winning novel- could fall into a coming of age –Bildungsroman –novel. Maybe I am biased, but I feel that Sunil Gangopadhyaya’s novel –Sei Semay- is definitely a more nuanced historical novel than Doerr’s work.


Set against the backdrop of the Bengal Renaissance and the rebellion of 1857, the novel revolves around the lives of great men including reformers like Ishwar Chandra Vidyasagar, Debendranath Tagore and his father Dwarkanath Tagore, and also poets like Michael Madhusudan Dutt. Originally written in Bengali, Those Days was translated by Aruna Chakravarti and combines history with fiction in the perfect manner.

Was the Bengal Renaissance the seed-time of nationalistic fervor that culminated in the Swadeshi Movement? Was it more in the nature of an enlightenment? Or was it a form of religious revivalism or Hindu nationalism, the betenoir of the secularists?

In Gangopadhyay’s world of the Bengal Renaissance, there are the good Europeans such as David Hare and John Bethune, sympathetic to the Indian cause just as there are bad Englishmen who comprise the bulk of the trading and missionary classes.

There are plenty of bad natives too: servile, decadent and collusive.(1)




The many walks in Lodhi gardens-Delhi, where four generations of our family have walked, or the hills and rivers –streams in and around the Rishikesh-Dehradun, or the hill temples in and around Shimla region would be the setting of some day trips of the family- if they had been written fifty years ago.

In the case of Buddhdeo family – many nuances of the journey which his father and grandfather took, the family having migrated from Karachi of what was then British India, came alive.

This thought made me recall conversations with senior family members, about their swimming in the waters of Nandprayag-Garhwal or the times when they would go to Benares-to visit their Jijaji and Didi (My grandfather-GPU-used to teach in BHU..see blog..


The family day trip, through nature trails, opened up many aspects of nature, family, reading journal and our home library. Later, when we returned, I showed them some pictures and relics, the momento given to my Father, on his retirement from Indian Army, after 33 years of service-on April 4,1996, which we have in our living room in Mississauga. These opened up other conversations and many nuances of family histories and associations with different institutions.


References- Suggested Further readings

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Ophir-to-Bassein: Some discussions from our Home Library

The marathons of adventure are to Himalayan peaks, to the Poles, and across the oceans

Chris Bonnington-Quest for Adventure



EXPLORING LOCAL HISTORIES-Vasai-Bassein-mentioned in Bible as Ophir

Having a home library is a step different from being part of a public library. Over some discussions and readings, we evolved this concept a bit further. Here are some illustrations which form a part of our intellectual adventure and family legacy.

Over the years, I have developed some journals-individual and joint- through readings and re-readings of books in our home library. As Appu visits from Mumbai, we had the opportunity of going through some books of the home library, and I showed her and read some excerpts from the first book in the Home Library at our Mississauga home-the Autobiography of Jawaharlal Nehru- which was gifted to me by my grandfather-Professor Ganesh Prasad Uniyal- on my fifteenth birthday-in 1982-November.

I invited Appu to read from any of the many books in our home library and was glad that she zeroed in on-Howard Zinn’s- People’s history of the United States.

She is finding the book interesting- and we discussed some parts of relatively recent history-25 years ago- the bombing of Yugoslavia during the Clinton Presidency years-and I told her of two countries with whose people, I have stayed and had many conversations-who have been affected by NATO’s Nation Building- Yugoslavia and Libya.

For refreshing memory- here is a video of a Reading from the Autobiography of Nehru in Riverwood-area-discussing his evolution of the concept of Non-cooperation through readings of Charlie Andrews and discussions with Gandhi-ji and Tagore.

Quest for adventure

Appu has been to many parts of the world, and this is her second visit to Canada, and she is the first person from our family from India to visit our new home in Mississauga, having come here earlier when we used to stay in 905 Ovation, near the Celebration square.  Now, in Candlestick, we have a Naturalization zone close to our house, and we went there in the morning and read excerpts from some books – One of them being the history of Bassein-by Dr.Teresa Albuquerque of Bombay Local History Society.


Tim Horton’s-DIXIE-Mississauga-Book discussions -2018-4

The Marathons of Adventure-…in his book “Quest for Adventure” Chris Bonnington talks of the marathons of adventure and compares them with different levels –ranging from a sprint to a marathon. The 100 yard dashes of adventure are activities which are very intense but of short duration. Take a short afternoon trip to Riverwood area-or Port Credit or even a two day trip to Niagara.

Taking such local excursions in and around the place you stay-say Mumbai-from where we can go to Vasai fort or Manoribel or for a trip with Bombay Natural history society-to have Breakfast with butterflies- is different from going to see local areas in a far off country like Canada- where through this and previous visits-we saw together the Toronto zoo- one of the best zoos in the world-or explored the nuances of the Natural history and Local history of Credit river area-

Toronto Zoo-2014-October


We walked to Naturalization zone, where we discussed many nuances of the way our family life has evolved in Canada, with the children who came here from two years in Malta- to join Middle School and have now grown into senior High school and even First year university.

And for the home library- we chose to read some excerpts from Dr.Teresa’s book on Bassein which tells of the history of this area –ranging from the times of Solomon- where Sopara is mentioned in the Bible as Ophir –today a disused port on the outskirts of modern  Bassein

To refresh memory- here are some readings in Naturalization zone area near our house.

From where we got that book

This is another interesting aspect of having a Home Library.

Where did we get this book from-what were we doing

For Example

Autobiography of Nehru-

Was gifted this by my grandfather-Professor Ganesh Prasad Uniyal-on my fifteenth birthday-1982-Nov

We used to stay in 9 Pratap Chowk-Delhi Cantonment at that time.

Chris Bonnington’s-Quest for Adventure-

Got this from the Annual Fair of ISM International school-Tripoli, where Mr.Francis –the English teacher had put up a nice stall, with many interesting books….2004

Mr.Francis taught us many things-over many discussions in Ben Ashor and Gurgi -still remember his introductions to Iago…”There is no villain like Iago in all of literature” or the nuances of Lahiri’s novels and short stories-The Interpreter of Malladies.

Basein-The Portuguese Interlude-by Teresa Albuquerque

Was gifted this by Father Ubaldo of Father Agnel Church-and Ashram-Mumbai…..


People’s History of United States-Howard Zinn



Chicago-2009-November-Cloud Gate Sculpture-Millenium Park-Chicago-Michigan- A public sculpture by Sir Anish Kapoor-.. when we got the book-by Howard Zinn-People’s history of the United States


Summary points

Having a home library –and developing a joint Reading journal through discussions of these books-is a way to Refine our understandings.

In our discussions on the evolution of Nehru’s understanding of civil disobedience, to the local histories of Basein-Vasai region of Mumbai to evolving –expanding our understanding our concepts of Adventure-after and through readings of Chris Bonnington’s ‘Quest for Adventure’ we refined and furthered our Home library

Hope Appu reads a few pages from Howard Zinn’s book and tells about some new points which she gained from that book. Looking forward to that discussion.

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Welcome Committee

In previous years, we welcomed the family members from other countries and I told my sons to form a “Welcome committee” and try to arrange gifts, plan out places to visit, and get a sense of the extended family in an intentional way.

So in July of 2016-I had told my sons to arrange gifts for their uncle Bharat and family. I gathered books-momentoes from areas where we had stayed, Letters to his daughter-by Nehru, a plaque of the Temples of Cyrene-which was part of Greek Libya (modern day Shahat) and Symbols of the Knights of St.John of Malta, and views of Sultanahmet-(the historic Constantinople) from Bosphorus.

A year before that, in July 2015, when their aunt Appu had come from Mumbai-we had gone to Niagara falls and seen different facets, including the “Blue Moon”-a second full moon in a calendar month

Now –anticipating Appu’s visit again- I told the boys about the “Welcome Committee” and they started rolling up their eyes.

So, just posting some pictures of Yester-years-to make them a bit more motivated


2015 7 (2)

MAID OF THE MIST-Boat-ride-Niagara-we drove back pretty late that day-as waited to see the sound and light show on the Occasion of Blue Moon- July 2015


2015 7 (5)

Sep 2017- Naturalization zone near Candlestick-Bharat-Bhai-Priti going for walk together


The Naturalization zone near our house- is a nice place to Think-Discuss-Reflect


Hopefully –weather permitting- will explore some areas of Hamilton
Dundurn-Burlington Heights

And Re-visit Wilket Creek area-Central Don-Toronto

and Port Credit- Jack Darling, Rattray Marsh and surrounding areas

Maybe, will take advice of some of my well wishers- and just go for some walks

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